Here are six deeper debate questions. Each one comes with arguments from both sides, so read them and pick yours.
1. You find out your partner once spent 19 days traveling abroad with their ex
AThat hurts
BIt's in the past
They took me to the same date spot they went to with their ex? Just knowing that would hurt.
When you're dating, of course you travel, here or abroad. Honestly, I'm more shocked that it'd hurt you.
Knowing they've been somewhere I've never been, with someone else... there's no way that memory feels good.
With their ex it was photos in front of the Eiffel Tower. You think pizza and a beer with me is gonna impress them?
Even a weekend trip would bother me, but 19 days? That's basically living together. I'd honestly break up over that.
So even a weekend trip with an ex is off-limits? Then you'd have to be hurt by anyone who's ever dated before.
A trip is a fantasy. Living together is years of being around each other every day, getting sick, fighting. Calling a long trip "living together" makes no sense.
2. Can you get over your first love?
AYou can
BYou can't
Every relationship feels like my first love. Every time, I'm like, "Oh, so this is what love is."
They say a guy takes his first love to the grave.
After dating a lot, the most recent feeling is the one that feels most like a first love.
It's not that the feelings are still there. It's the memories that stick around, so you can't forget.
I've dated ten people, but the person I live with now is my first love. I'm with them because I got over the first one.
It's not the person you can't forget. It's who you were back then, the first time you loved someone.
3. Your partner steps out for a smoke alone with your friend
AThat's fine
BNot okay
They go out for a smoke together, and what, something's gonna happen? It's not.
They keep disappearing for 10, 15 minutes at a time. We get zero time together.
And I'm stuck sitting alone at the bar. That's just inconsiderate.
Smoke breaks bring people closer. Two people out there talking about everything... you never know.
You're stressing way too much over something that's never going to happen.
4. Would you let your partner team up with the other couple's partner in a contest?
ALet them
BNo way
You're on a double date. The contest is squats while holding your partner, and first place wins $3,000.
Stuff like this is basically field day. I'd just team up with the other person's partner.
Even if we come in dead last together, that's a memory.
I tried it holding my girlfriend once. No strength, three reps, dead last. It was humiliating and I felt so bad for her. Honestly, I figured first place was better off in another guy's hands.
Then afterward it's "We won!" and "You were so light, let's grab a drink." I'd hate that so much.
Even if it's not love, when you do something like that together, something forms between just the two of you.
5. Drinking vs smoking, which is worse?
ADrinking is worse
BSmoking is worse
If I had to quit one for life, it's drinking, no question. Forget how people act drunk, the hangovers alone kill me.
I've quit both. Quitting drinking was easy. Quitting smoking was hell.
A partner who smokes a lot, I don't worry about. A partner who drinks a lot, I'm always scared they'll do something stupid.
If you really love someone, you get them to quit smoking. Their health matters.
Smoking doesn't get you drunk. Drinking makes you lose it, and that's when people screw up.
Smoking feels good for a minute, but it all builds up in your body. A drink after work, though? That actually clears your head.
Drinking wrecks relationships. With smoking, the only one you're killing is yourself.
The older I get, the more obvious it is. Smoking does nothing good for you. Nothing.
6. Someone who only turns on the flirting at drinks when guys are around
AThat's fine
BCringe
Don't fall for it. Anyone can see they're not even a little drunk.
I'm not falling for it, I'm just seeing it in a good light. Even if it's an act, they're doing it to impress me. What's not to like?
Some people do the baby voice when guys are around, and the second the guy goes to the bathroom, they're a whole different person. I hate that.
Who else are you supposed to flirt with, your friends? As long as they're not going after someone taken, it's not a problem.
Which of the six would you argue about the longest? Debate questions like these drop every Sunday in Infinite Balance, our would you rather app. You hear both sides one at a time, then pick yours. Grab it here.